Sunday, March 31, 2013

...excuse me, I just googled all over myself...

Don't pretend like you've never been so incredibly bored to the point of googling yourself. 

This is what happens when I google myself...
So really just a bunch of random looking normal people and oh look! I'm the third one there! (plus that really awkward leftover picture from 9th grade homecoming on that myspace place that I'd rather not revisit) 

When you google Mariel....
crazy fencer lady!!! And Mariel gets two pictures of herself! yahoo! 




Welllll when you google my roommate, this is what happens....

PORN STAR!!! ironic? Possibly. 



What happens when you google yourself? 


EASTAHHH!

Soo I was busy stuffing my face today with candy and deliciousness and putting myself into a sugar induced coma to actually think of something clever to post for easter...so, please enjoy these chuckle worthy photos I ripped off the internet. Hip hooray! You know what I don't understand? I don't want to go off some religious rant or what ever because me and religion go together like dinosaurs and carrots but someone please tell me how zombie Jesus turned into bunnies and candy? I don't get it...anyway, while I ponder this, enjoy this half assed blog....








Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Tibia or not Tibia...that is the question.

I think I find this a little more humerus than I should. But how often do you get the opportunity to whip out all your broken bone puns???
Oh yeah, forgot to tell you that I fucked some shit up.
"Took a hard, violent fall, kinda pin-balled down there. Hit a lot of railings, broke a lot of shit. I'm not saying I survived, but I thrived."








nah, just kidding. But I did sprain my leg trying to load furniture onto a truck and slipped on the ice and hit it on the lifty uppy thingy.    
2 weeks on crutches, ya'll. 


  Basically my life is like this chick and everyone else is like WEEEE LOOK AT ME WALKINGGGG! Be JEALOUSSSS!


SOoooooo now I am trying to attempt rehearsal, class and filmmaking looking like the token wheel chair guy in a corporate stock photo.....
 "LOOK, WE CAN BE DIVERSE TOO! THAT MUST MEAN WE'RE THE BEST COMPANY EVER! AND WE'RE ALL CROSSING ARMS BECAUSE CROSSED ARMS MEANS WE GET SHIT DONE (except Carol. Carol is that fuck in the front who didn't get the charcoal gray suit and arm crossing memo. get your shit together, Carol.) AND LOOKING UP AT SOMETHING ON THE CEILING MEANS WE ARE OPTIMISTIC FOR THE FUTURE! HOORAYYYY!" 
Hey, they got to get a leg up on the competition if they want to up sales next quarter. (That was pun #3 if you're still counting) 


Anyway, I've figured out screwing up your leg isn't so bad after you get past the most awful, painful, tearing, gushing blood everywhere, bones sticking out in all direct---I'm exaggerating, but you get the point.....after you get past all of that, you find out that by looking extremely pitiful hobbling around on crutches with a wrapped leg trying to carry all of your stuff, you make  people feel bad for you! And they're like "let me love you and help youuuu!"

At first its like STAHHPP ITTT I CAN DO IT BY MYSELFFFF
"I FORGOT HOW TO LIFEEEE!"

But then it ain't so bad because I got someone to take out my trash for me by simply failing at everything like those struggle bus people in infomercials who just cant seem to do anything right and totally freak out at everything.











I don't mean to sound like an awful person (wait...yes. yes. i do. thats the whole point of this.) But seriously, thanks everyone for helping out a cripple. Though if you really wanted to help, you'd foot my bill (there goes #4)

Okay, okay....no more lame puns....

*snort*

I'm done now. Five seems to be a good place to stop...for now....

Anyway, wish me luck on a speedy recovery....

oh poop there goes another one. that was completely unintentional, for the record.
I'm gonna go now....

damn it. Figuratively. Go away from this page because I can't literally go because I sprained my leg.....
Yeahhhhh bye now. 

Monday, February 18, 2013

Slippery Slope

Mondays are a pretty magical day in the life of Mariel Murray. At 8 or 9am I get up, go to breakfast, go to class, go to lunch, go to dance, go to another class that ends at 5pm, and then pass out,. Transitioning between these events involves a lot of zooming across the land on my part.

Today, however, there was a slight interruption in my frantic running.

This morning I was filled with an overwhelming desire to reminisce, to go back to the days of my horseback riding. My boots were buried under a mountain of shoes, and I mined them out this morning. They functioned exceptionally in the stirrup, but once I took them out of their element they had a tendency to not perform so well. And apparently I was asking too much when I had hoped they would grip the ground a little bit.

After I devoured my stir-fry, I went back to my dorm to get some cloths for dance. I walked by the office of my Resident Director, Alexandra, and was disappointed when I looked into her office and she wasn't there to look back at me. I still kept looking into the office to gaze back at my reflection, and as I typically tell myself, not out of vanity, out of habit. Dancers tend to look into reflective surfaces whenever we do anything, since we've became accustomed to watching ourselves. Or maybe we're all vain and full or it. But regardless of my reasoning behind my obsession with myself, I still stared, and forgot to look as to where I was going.

In result, I started to walk down the stairs, and it wasn't an absolute necessity to look as to where I was going, as I had walked down those stairs hundreds of times. So, I didn't see the sand. My boots, which had no desire to do their job off the stirrup, landed right on the sand. Walking on the concrete outside, covered in a layer of a sandy-icy mixture, was bad enough, but the sand on the staircase was somehow worse, especially when I was too busy staring back at myself to notice it. My shoe hit the floor and didn't stop as I picked up my other foot, so my entire body was in the air for several seconds until I landed directly on my hindquarters and slid down the half-flight of stairs, wetting my pants in the process.

My luck took a turn for the better as I picked myself up, my pride still on the ground, and looked around the corridor. Not a soul was there to witness it. I thank the lord for that.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

happy naked flying babies day!



No, I am not tripping on acid. There are flying naked babies shooting at people today. As a child, we called it cupid. But in college its called a fuck fairy because what adult gives another adult a giant pink teddy bear without the hope of getting laid?

Thats what I thought. 

So normally valentines day (thats what today is if you haven't caught on yet) is just another painful reminder of how single I am.
but this time......


IM WORKING ON A SHOW!!!! YAYYYYYYY


what, were you expecting something else? 
Sorry to disappoint you, but I am still single.........
image......and ready to mingle. 
hey dere, sexy. whatchu doing tonight? You busy? 


CAUSE I AM!

Yeah! first tech rehearsal for Fallujah! (come see it starting next wednesday shameless plug yes getoverit)

Everyone else today is like                                                    











but I'm like















but since thats only in the evening and i have the rest of the day free, I will be spreading the LOVEEEE
image

by presenting only the greatest people in the world with these valentines that I have made in photoshop...
because I have no life
or a boyfriend. 
hah hah...















meh. oh well!
here ya go!

hah. puns. 

hah. cats. 


hah. nerdy things. 

hah. dismembered sheep parts. 

okay, I'm done now. Happy Valentines Day!!!!


Wednesday, February 6, 2013

So now I'm an addict

Oh my garnet, I haven't posted on here in FOREVER!!

I'm currently sitting in my Research class, which is probably even 10x more boring than it sounds, and I'm just hoping my prof thinks I'm taking notes on my laptop. I am a firm believer in that I come up with my best ideas (for photography, choreography, and writing) when I'm clearly supposed to be working on something else. But hey, at least I'm still being productive.

Anyways, I've been having this feeling for a long time that I just haven't been myself... something had been missing from my life... and I have discovered what this thing is.

Coffee.

OH MY GOD.

How did I ever live without this stuff? I had been living my whole life as a zombie, going place to place with halfheartedness in my steps and feeling as though anywhere my body went, my mind usually stayed behind in my bed. And that is no way to live.

But with coffee, the world is a different place. It is as though I had dropped my car keys in the darkness of the night, and coffee is my flashlight.  Coffee is my enabler. Coffee has transported me to another entire world, and I refuse to come back home.

Seriously though, I'm never going back to the way things were. So basically, watch out, because I've reached a whole new level of crazy.

I have also successfully gone half of the class without listening to a word my professor spoke. Mission accomplished.









Monday, February 4, 2013

my apologies

hey sorry I haven't posted in a long while.  I know that this probably upsets all two of our followers greatly. To return balance and harmony to the world, here is a picture of my sister riding a unicorn that I made yesterday. Enjoy. 



I am going to pretend that we've been cooking up something extra awesome for you, but really we've just been lazy as poop.

Let me just say I've have had a shortage in my creative go go juice lately....


 aha. the exploitation of children is funny. 

But anyway, all that go go juice has been funneled into my schools production of Avenue Q (ya, the show with puppet sex and songs about porn. Keepin' musical theatre classy, folks) the last couple weeks so really all I want to do is sleep forever. 


Which is what I did 90% of yesterday. And make it look my sister was riding a unicorn on photoshop. Yep. Funny how that all these smart people have been breaking their backs for thousands and thousands of years trying to improve technology and all we have to show for it is the ability to make it look like someone is riding a unicorn. And this. This too

Bravo, mankind. Way to stick it to the man. 
But I still love you. Lets hug it out. 

Okay, thats enough. See ya later. 

Also, i give you my lovely roommate riding a polar bear.